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Liverpool jokes - 05-January-2012, 12:44

Q: What do Pool Fans and sperm have in common?
A: One in 2,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.

Q: What do Liverpool fans and mushrooms have in common?
A: They both have big heads and live in ****.

Q: What's the difference between a Scouser and a broken clock?
A: Even a clock is right twice a day!

Q: What is the difference between a battery and a Scouser fan?
A: A battery has a positive side.

Q: How many Liverpool fans does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Yeah, as if they have electricity in Liverpool...

Q: Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, an intelligent Liverpool supporter and an old drunk are walking down the street together when simultaneously they each spot a fifty quid note. Who gets it?
A: The old drunk, of course - the other 3 are mythical creatures.
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05-January-2012, 21:57

Not too bad.

Scouser arrives at the pearly gates, St Peter says "I"m sorry mate, no scoucers allowed"

Scoucer says "Come on mate, I was in church last Sunday and put 50.00 into the collection box"

St Peter says he will go and speak to God.

He comes back 5 minutes later.

Scoucer says "Well, can I come in? what did God say?"

ST Peter says "I spoke with God and he says Heres your 50.oo back, now eff Off"
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